Every Path Leads Somewhere But Some Paths Have No End

I have definitely been off my stride for a while now. Being retired does not mean having time to do all those things you said you would accomplish once you no longer had to report to the shop, or desk, or wherever that fiscal harness awaited. I have discovered that concept is a myth. On the other hand, don’t ask me to give a rational accounting of my actual time expenditures. You would not be convinced that I wasn’t goofing off and I would be embarrassed to own up to Richard’s Version of Reality.

Admittedly, I have been put off for the better part of 14 months by having to mentally deal with the incredible, apparent disintegration of the expression of what I had taken to be civility and relative forthrightness of our political process evidenced in our presidential campaign/election. I’ll not go into detail here, as the constant disruption of any semblance of due process and personal integrity by our elected and appointed officials is detail enough and can do without my feeble two-cents worth. (I will add some observations and commentary at the end of this post.)

Once the inauguration was over and this voyage of the USS Absurdia was launched, I was caught flat-footed as it were and spent hours trying to figure out what happened and why and more importantly, how was I going to order my own life going forward. I think I have worked out a plan of sorts.


Much time of 2016 was spent tracing family history, verifying family documents of birth, marriage and death so I could file for what is called Foreign Birth Registration in the Republic of Ireland. (Thanks to my grandfather having been born in Cork city and his son Raymond, my father having successfully generated 4 offspring, among whom I am the youngest, our generation was still eligible under Irish law, to apply for citizenship, no strings attached.) This was no easy feat, considering that, in true Irish-American Catholic tradition, we had very limited factual information who our forebears were, or where they married or died. There were many things adults didn’t share with children in those days. But that’s a whole other tale.

All documents were sent to Dublin for review and approval on June 6, 2016. With nothing important left to do; (mind you, “important” is used in the retiree’s privileged, relative vocabulary and not to be dismissed as “without essence and impact on one’s life and daily duties) we set off for another u-drive-it, 1300+ mile trip to Massachusetts and New Hampshire to visit family. We dillied and dallied and ate foods we hardly ever ate in Florida. Nothing extravagant or extraordinary – just not our usual fare as we like to eat as Romans eat and not upset their sense of healthy consumables. Diets can always come later.

Time dribbled on and eventually we landed back in Florida, picked up our accumulated bundle of mail but alas, Dublin had not been heard from. “Rats!” said I, the system was grinding slowly and surly the fine lads in Dublin’s Foreign Office were doing all they could to honor my request. Privately I was plagued with questions – What did I leave out? Were the documents all authentic, long form, stamped and sealed,??? etc.

Finally, early October, I got a very large envelope in the mail with my citizenship document and all the originals I had sent in nearly four months before. Honestly, I was slightly amazed as I thought that the FBR (Foreign Birth Registration) office might be overloaded, thanks in not small part to Yanks like myself who were answering the Government’s invitation to all who might qualify to submit requests, and the recent Brexit phenom in England.

Too bad, you other folks. I’m in, if not on my way!

Along with the official citizenship document was a very welcome application for a passport, which was already my next question and quest. Off again, along with a few more Euros, went an application to Dublin with the expected turn around time of about 6 weeks.

I should point out that once we were home from New England and the citizenship docs were in hand, we had more pressing and really important business to tend to. Vacation!! Pity the restless retirees. Back in the boring home surroundings we figured out we could still visit Denise’s niece in Texas and get our hands on the cute-as-buttons ten-month old twin boys before they lost their incredible cuteness and antics. Then if we could manage the itinerary carefully, we could still make use of nearly 2 weeks of time-share stuff we had mostly paid for already, so we went up to Myrtle Beach, So Car, and Destin Beach, in the Florida panhandle. We were able to get home with 2 days to spare before we had to fly – yes, had to – to Minneapolis to see 6 1/2 y/o granddaughter Hannah, with her first year’s introduction to ballet solidly behind her, perform in The Nutcracker, appearing once as a snowflake and once as an Angel. That alone was worth the trip but we were treated to one of the coldest days of the year, a brisk -24 degrees and 8-9 inches of snow. Oh, Destin, where are you now???

Then for the first time in almost 20 years we had Christmas day together with daughters Amy and Laura as well as grand kids Hannah and Ethan. Wonderful trip. Our presence at that particular time happened to coincide with Amy’s leaving MN for 5 days in the where?? the Florida Keys ?? go figure. Her partner, Wade, had vacation time and hotel lodgings already paid for on Key Largo and we were there, in St.Paul, to look after their 2 terrific dogs. Grand kids and grand puppies, all in one visit.The stars were certainly aligned. Except Daughter was in the Keys, Puppies were well cared for, fed and played with, but Mom and Dad we still in freezer shock and hoping it would not snow.

Back home in Fl 3 days after Christmas with a cold and sinus infection that would last 10-12 days. Bad enough to be ill but was also trying to brace myself for the installation of President #45 in a few days. Yet…I was truly elated. Jan 19, the day before the inauguration, my beautiful Irish passport arrived by FedEx. That made my day, my week, my month. I never dreamed I would have dual citizenship anywhere, with passport to travel, and the possible cure to any future malignant case of Trumpitis I might develop. The rest of this story waits to be played out. I’ll let you know.

Now, the other story. A couple of years ago, when I decided I needed something to bring a lot of family literature together, mostly written by my father and my oldest brother Ray, both of whom have departed us years ago but left an amazing amount of poetry and short stories and half a dozen novels behind, which, like the family information I had to dig up, were scattered among several family members, in boxes and closets from NE to MN. Besides taking up the challenge of constructing a blog of my own, I now saw a vehicle to bring all those writings out into the open. My father’s vast collection of hand written poems dated all the way back to 1962/63. Thankfully, my mother had typed them all on a small portable typewriter. Most of what  brother Ray had written was typed but in dire need of review and editing. My wife Denise did a great job of typing several thousand of his pages into digital format, along with Dad’s poems. Ray (Jr.) died in 1997.

They needed to be given a voice.

So my plan for the blog was a modest one and my contribution was to be low-key, daily or weekly happenings that caught my interest and whose virtue or significance was to be left to any readers who stumbled up my”Path”. I was not interested in earth-shaking prose or political or religious debate. I wanted to find a mode of interacting with the times that meshed with my belief that being honestly human did not demand super human strength but only an attentiveness to the world around us, human and non human, all matter, all the universe and our desire to honor life wherever we find it.

As I pointed out in my opening remarks today, I have been put-off by the current political events and have spent many hours trying to get a better grip on where to stand today. I have concluded that it is more important to find a functional, personally satisfying response for my future, than to contribute, endlessly to the cries and lies that make up too much of our awareness today. The unleashed forces will work their purposes and the best I can hope for in my remaining years is to live a life of active love and compassion for every person I have contact with. A kind of embrace of life itself that will perhaps bring a sense of “being OK” in a world going berserk.

I am posting a recent article from the blog of my good family friend and incredibly perceptive author, Tony Equale and hope you make time to read more of what he has to say throughout his postings.

For my original blog posting (re-posted last summer) please click the link below.   (https://rharding0728.wordpress.com/2016/07/07/about-off-the-beaten-path/?iframe=true&theme_preview=true)

For Tony Equale’s blog post and comments see:


Unwittingly, I have been mirroring his conclusions and expectation for the future:

     “If we are to have a future as a species it will have to be characterized by international cooperation, negotiation, and collaboration derived from mutual respect and a sincere esteem for all people as people.  We are never going to stop 63 million people from doing what they think is the best thing for them.  Our only hope going forward … and in the long term … is to help them to understand what the best thing for them really is.  They must begin to think of their well being in terms of humankind itself.  That is the enduring task, there is no alternative.”    Tony Equale, An Imperial People.


Published by

Richard D

Retired psychotherapist and Adjunct University prof. Remaking my path as I go and inviting any and all path-walkers to share meditation thoughts, personal art works, music interests and just plain fun observations of life's passing moments This path goes anywhere and everywhere, open to all possibilities. Hopefully a step beyond FB, Twtr, etc. An opportunity for family, friends, coworkers, friends we've yet to meet to come together in an effort of friendly enrichment. Walkers of all paths are welcome. Please join us. RDH.

6 thoughts on “Every Path Leads Somewhere But Some Paths Have No End”

  1. Kind Richard, I love your blog! The beautiful composition of words, purposeful thoughtfulness, and determination for wholeness, delightfully illustrated in your blog is a heartfelt reminder for me to be fair and loving to myself and those around me, especially now as we find ourselves in a state of more disconnect from one another culturally, spiritually, politically and humanely. Your darling daughter Amy, whom I have adopted as my own, I am her chocolate mama and she is my vanilla latte baby, spoke so lovingly of your writing prowess and talent… she did not exaggerate! I look so forward to more! Congratulations on your dual citizenship and on your travel of the many paths that await Richard’s version of reality! Exciting!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Dear Tammy, how wonderful to read your kind words in praise of my questionable talent. I really appreciate the fact that you and Lisa both seem to be devoted followers of my “eloquent babbling”, as someone has put it recently. As you will see if you read through my many posts, there have been precious few comments which is fine. I write mostly for the fun of it and like to knock ideas around and hope that others will find something to bring a moments peace or joy in a current climate of anger, frustration and confusion. I purposely try to stay away from “problematic” issues, as there are hundreds of opinions about what we should be doing and “real” solutions are hard to come by. I prefer the “human interest” focus because we seem to have gone so far away from meaningful human activities in pursuit of fame and treasure, we scarcely have time to take deep breaths and simply enjoy the companionship of fellow humans.
      Thanks for sharing and letting me know you are reading. I’ve heard many references re: Amy’s Chocolate Mamma, all of them good and I know she values your kindness and friendship as I do. I’ll try to live up to your literary expectations.

      Richard D


    2. My Tam-a-lamb! I love you and love that you also appreciate all things Richard H as much as I do! I had told him to write books a long time ago.
      Lisa Holmes -if not daughter at least little sis because I am way too old for you to be my mom.

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Lisa, I can’t write novels, they require too many characters and good and evil shenanigans,etc. And now that I am older and more feeble I can’t remember why I wandered into the living-room or why I apparently left my socks in front of the dishwasher. No way am I going to keep track of a whole gaggle of characters who only live in my head and give them meaningful lives. Imagine if Picasso wrote short-stories and pasted his characters together in verbal cubism or such. But then….the idea is not without merit, come to think of it. [Now look what you’ve gone and done].
        Before I go, I left a few misplaced words in my last response to you. I should have referred to you as the Fish-er Lady. A fish-lady is open to too many spurious imaginings = Wanda, mermaids, Molly Malone(s), etc. Fisher Lady is most appropriate and suggests positive images for the average reader.
        Also, I’d like to say that my spell check was not working or that I was in a desperate hurry when I suggested the high honor of Philet-er. Of course there is no such person so I am correcting it to Phillet-er, or filleter if you will.
        I hope you do make it to the finals of Nurse of the Year (fill in the blanks) and if you need any recommendations from impartial observers with filleting skills (that are rarely needed, as fish usually swim around and chuckle at what I think they should eat), I’m your man!
        Regards to you, Tammy and Soup. Hasta.


  2. Oh how I have missed your eloquent babbling! You are truly blessed with the skill of writing. I am grateful to read it. I wondered about Irish citizenship because I believe my ancestors were from there too! I will ask Soup( my nickname for Amy) about you experience. Send love and good health wishes to you and the misses! Lisa Holmes

    Liked by 1 person

    1. At first I said to myself, Whoa, some bored %^**! commented on my post….then I said, “Who???” They clearly have an astute appreciation of fine literature – eloquent babbling, indeed. (it doesn’t matter what one says as long as its eloquent). Then I said, wait a minute, Lisa Holmes –of course, the Fish Lady. Faithful reader and sometime comment person, recently recommended by me to be named Nurse of the Year [fill in the blanks –/–/—-] and Phun Loving Phileter of the Phirst Order to be bestowed upon her by the Phin, Phur and Pheather Phraternity of Phlorida, friend of Soup and thus befriended by me/us, and always a joy to communicate with.
      Seriously, (as though the preceding babbling was somehow in jest), I always appreciate your tuning in and your uplifting responses to my wonky “wanderings”. This whole political thing has become such a downer and polarizing, demoralizing situation, I find myself spending way too much time fretting – or is it phretting? – and not enough time regaining my balance. And now, lo and behold, Lisa Holmes, Pending Nurse of the Year –/–/—, etc., etc. has sprang me back to my blogging self. Thank you.
      If your father or grandfather was born in Ireland and you can document same, you can apply for citizenship, which I did and now have dual citizenship and successfully was granted a Irish passport (Ireland is still an EU country.) Check out a website for an Irish consulate or embassy – it will have all the info and application forms you would need.
      Now, and Soup and Laura both love this, if Dad maintains up-right and breathing status, and continues taking nourishment, a journey to Ire is in the future and I would love to find at least a plot of land to purchase, camp on, and OD of trout and salmon for the rest of my days. Ciao for now. Stay healthy and lift a Jameson’s for me on 3 /17. Peace.


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